Patience or the lack there of has been one of my biggest downfalls. I like most people want instant gratification. My mind is quick and can move at the speed of light. But it has always been getting my body and everyone else to move at that speed. I had to overcome this short fall in my life. Not all things come as quick as I wanted. It became frustrating. Learning how to be patient isn’t fun. It is a royal pain in the rear. But God knew what I needed to overcome. I was part of a small church. The pastor and I were best friends. It was a good experience for me. I thoroughly enjoyed working in that little church. There was a young woman who became part of our congregation. She was from the south and another state. It seems that she took a dislike to me from the beginning. Every time that she came into the church, she would walk up to me and insulted me. I just tried to ignore her, but that didn’t last for long. She wouldn’t stop. This kept up for a good while and I became angry. I wanted to throttle her. One day as I was praying about the situation, I was pointing my finger toward her. God stopped me and said look at your hand. He asked how many fingers were pointing back at me. I said 4. He said to me that the problem wasn’t the young woman. It was me. I was the one who was angry. I went to this person and asking her to forgive me for being angry at her. And guess what, she did and became a real blessing to me. Oh by the way, she never stopped insulting me.

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How far will you go not to feel heartache? Will you lose your humanity not to feel pain? Did you know that heartache is a physical as well as a spiritual pain? I have seen people do so many thing to avoid the reality of heartache. The most common pursuits are drugs, alcohol and sex. People are dehumanizing themselves thinking they are coping with their problems. It has always been easier to run from a problem than to face it. Of course this creates its own set of problems to deal with. Thus compounding the situation until it crushes the individual. So what do you do? How do you overcome the situation? Being dispassionate is clearly not the road to take. Yes I speak from experience. I have walk these roads before and found nothing but pain on them. I wanted to be free to love and to be loved. So I turned myself around to face the pain. I had help all along the way. I couldn’t have made it unless I had the help. First thing I had to do was to face that I had fallen short and had come to the end of myself. You have heard the expression that confession is good for the soul. This is a confession to you. But the confession that I had to make was to my Father who created me. He has always loved me and wanted me to come home to Him. As He has said in the bible in  1 John 1:8-9 “If we say that we have no sin, we deceive ourselves, and the truth is not in us. If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.” (KJV).  This is the road where we will receive the help we need to love again.

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The most advanced species on this earth is also the weakest one. All my life I have heard the saying, use your mind not your back. When you do, you will make your way in life easier and better and you will be more prosperous. Then tell me why is it that history repeats itself? If we are so smart and understand the universe, that we can’t solve hunger or war? Or solve all the problems that plague man. You know what is strange is that about every 40 to 50 years, the same problems crop up all across the world. It is like people have forgotten everything that has happened before. And it takes a world conflict to solve it all over again. Yesterday was 9/11. That single event mobilized a nation into action. And today 15 years later, it is like it almost didn’t happen. You know what is sad, it that there has been a natural or manmade disaster every year since 9/11. And the only response is that it is caused by Global Warming, 0h well. Now what do we do? How do we change our lives for the better? Or what is it going to cost to change things for the better? In the bible it says this, in James 1:23-24 “For if any be a hearer of the word, and not a doer, he is like unto a man beholding his natural face in a glass: For he beholdeth himself, and goeth his way, and straightway forgetteth what manner of man he was.” (KJV).

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We are social beings. Our lives are made up of the connections to other people. It is always sad to see children that have no parents. Their hearts reach out for any love in their lives. It is a powerful draw to our own hearts. Because it is not only natural but it is a spiritual need. We search all of our lives for that love that touches our hearts in a meaningful way. When we look on a couple that has a strong relationship and we are envious. Because we want that. Do you know why a divorce is so hard on the people going through it? Because it is taking the love that we are always striving for all of our lives and throwing it away. It is tearing our hearts into two pieces. Love is the strongest emotion in our lives. And it causes the greatest pain in our lives. Yet people are out in bars and other places looking for love. What is that country western song, Oh yea, looking for love in all the wrong places? It asked the question, where do you look for love? Is it a place that you will find the love that you are really looking for? Or will you walk away with that empty feeling again. Have you ever cried out in anguish for the pain in your heart? All the time wishing you could have that relationship you have always wanted. It says in the bible in John 3:16 “For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life.” (KJV). It is the love worth having and keeping.

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You have heard of the saying, winning at craps the hard way. It is the roundabout way to win. I was asking the question today, why do people have to learn the hard way. The answer is as interesting as the question. In your life, what decision or problem solved do you remember the most? It is usually the one that you had more difficulty solving. The one you had to spend more time on than it was worth. Or the one that cost you the most. Which decision or problem solved has the most value to you? It is always the one that cost you the most. Our mind processes everything and prioritizes it according to how difficult it was to obtain. It is a most peculiar human trait. It is also how we relate to other people. Sometimes we don’t even know that we are doing it. It has become such a part of our lives that we do it automatically. It is also how we change our lives. If the cost becomes so great, then we are motivated to change. You would think that doing things the easy way would be the method of choice. But anything that comes easy has no value in our lives. It all comes down to value. What do you value the most in your life? It is an interesting question. The bible talks about this very subject. It says in Luke 7:47 “Wherefore I say unto thee, Her sins, which are many, are forgiven; for she loved much: but to whom little is forgiven, the same loveth little.” (KJV).

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I use to watch that show all the time. It was a family oriented show in prime time. There isn’t much on TV these days. I think I watch 3 or 4 shows at most. Now a days the internet is taking the TV Audiences away. If you want to watch old programming the internet has them. I can sit for hours watching old movies or TV shows. I don’t miss TV at all. It is rare that I watch the evening whatever. I was going to say news, but it has turned into the evening joke. If I watch any TV, I always have the remote in my hand to mute all commercials. They are an assault on our senses and sensibility. For a long time, commercials didn’t take more time than the programming. But ever since the economy turned for the worst, about 8 years ago, commercials have begun to take over the programming. Also when a commercial comes on the volume on your TV goes up, by itself. This is just another example how thing are changing in America. The change isn’t for the better. I will not listen to another political ad or commentary about anyone. I just want the elections to come today and be over. The good people that would help our country have been eliminated. Now we have to choose between to two worst candidates. So it is no surprise, surprise, surprise that our nation has taken a down turn. And if we as citizens don’t stand up and change things, there might not be anything left to change.

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People are taught through life experiences to put forth a positive front. Although people always are in need in their life, they don’t tell just anyone what is really going on. I found that most people don’t want to hear what’s wrong with you. Because most of the time it is what is wrong with them. And it only reminds them that they need help. So people smile and say everything is fine. And the person goes on with their life while distress creeps in to take hold. And I will tell you a truth, when distress fully takes hold that person is destroyed. It is so simple to listen to someone and let them feel better about themselves. The hard part is how you handle the information. There is always someone whose life is far worse than ours. Being patient is a virtue that everyone needs to learn. And yes it is learned. It is harder to rebuild a life than it is to repair one. Life goes on and we will man up and face it. But what good is mankind if they can’t help each other. Think about what you say to people when they ask how you are next time. Did you let them into your life? Or are you going to live with the distress that is eating away at your heart. Only you can make a difference in this life. Pick your choose. It is a Cajun saying.

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I have always found what people say interesting. People will say the most amazing things. And what is funny is that sometimes they don’t even know they said it. I started listening to people to see what they were saying. People talk about most anything. Sometimes they just like to hear their own voice. But if you listen to what is being said you will make the most interesting discoveries. For the longest time my wife had to pry words out of me. I wouldn’t generally talk about anything. One reason was that I didn’t want to share what was happening to me. I am a very private person. You may ask why then am I writing this blog. To tell you the truth, God told me to express myself and what I have learned in my life time in this blog. It took me a while to really begin to say things openly. I will tell you another truth, if you listen to a person talk within 5 minutes, they will tell you their life’s history. You know there is a difference between hearing and listening. Everyone hears, but not everyone listens. You have heard the expression that you are condemned out of your own mouth. You need to try listening to people. You will be amazed at what you hear. When you speak, it isn’t the amount of words that you say. It is what you say that counts. As it says in the bible in Matthew 12:34 “….for out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaketh.” (KJV).

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I like to believe that I am an even-keeled man. I started my life as a happy go lucky kind of guy. I would rarely ever get angry at most anything. I remember an incident in high school. This classmate started an argument with me but I wasn’t going to get upset. He did it to show off to the rest of the class. He wouldn’t stop and kept on going. He started pushing me. I turned to him and without a word and pinned him by his neck against the wall. Then to my surprise I lifted him on the ground by his neck. He shut his mouth and stopped as I let him down. I still wasn’t angry with him but I scared him and the class. No one tried to get me angry after that. As in life circumstances change on a regular basis and you either go with the flow or fight against it. If you fight against it, be prepared to fight. Because things will happen to you like hurt feelings or anger. As I fought against circumstances, my anger grew. Until I was just the most disagreeable and cantankerous person you would ever meet.  This is where I met God. He came into my life and changed me forever. The first thing He did is to remove the anger from my heart. It felt so good not to be angry all the time. Everything changed. I saw the world and people differently. I could actually see people for they really are which is lost and hurt. As the bible says in Matthew 11:6 “And blessed is he, whosoever shall not be offended in me.” (KJV).

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It is funny what you remember through the years. If it was traumatic you might remember it. If it was pleasant, you tuck it away to remember in the hard times. Our minds have an unusual way of putting things in order. The priority of the day is first, then a smell or sight will stimulate a memory. Sometimes a memory can be very strong. And sometimes you can’t remember why you do things a certain way. Our memory began back in the womb. Most of the time people can’t remember being born, but they remember a feeling. When a baby smiles or laughs or cries, they remember the feeling. And that feeling generates an emotion that stays with us the rest of our lives. You have meet people who have had a hard childhood. They are apparent to the world. Looking on Facebook, there is a bumper crop of babies. They are cute and cuddly and a lot of work. Do you know why God gives us babies? It not only to populate the earth, but it is the complete us. I have found that my 4 sons became my teacher. And I had to have children to complete my life. As we go through this life, we are ever learning to be human beings. We are the only species on this earth that takes an entire lifetime to learn what to do. As it says in the bible in Matthew 9:36 “But when he saw the multitudes, he was moved with compassion on them, because they fainted, and were scattered abroad, as sheep having no shepherd.”

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